Positive Change Model
“The secret of change is to focus all of your energy not on fighting the old, but on building the new..”
- Socrates
Change is inevitable. Even if we decide to do nothing, things around us, including us, will change. Therefore every decision we make has a direct impact on the change that will inevitably follow. And so if we expect a positive change, our decisions must be aligned with that goal. If we are not seeing the positive results we want to see, our decisions and actions must change. If we continue to walk along the same old beaten path, there will come change, but it won’t take us where we want to go.
Desirable change is possible only if the mindset shifts. And mindset can shift only through education and learning. Learning through observation, own experience, trial and error. Even the failure can be the source of valuable lessons and wisdom if only one chooses to look. Here at Mindset, we believe that it is the knowledge and self-awareness that initiate the positive change within us. Even if it takes a while for us to actually step off that old beaten path, the moment we learn something new, we have the opportunity to see ourselves and the situation from a brand new perspective. In that moment the seed of desirable change is planted.
Desirable change begins with the realisation. Whether the new knowledge is born internally through manifestation of our feelings and experience or comes from an external source, the seed of change is being planted. We now have an opportunity to either act on it or stay idle - to cultivate the seed or discard it. Our eventual action or inaction is determined by many factors, internal and external (self-doubt, social pressure, etc.), consciously or subconsciously.
key executive functioning skills: metacognition
One of the most frequent reasons of inaction is fear. Fear of change, fear of leaving the comfort zone (even if that comfort zone is making us uncomfortable, having a routine itself can be comforting).
This is the first make or break point, where we test this new knowledge against our priorities, our beliefs, and routine mindset and see if it triggers the desire strong enough for us to change. This desire to change is the driving factor of any mindset shift.
key executive functioning skills: metacognition, emotional flexibility, prioritising
As a result, the more defined goal(s) are born. Setting clear, defined goals that are in line with our capabilities and resources is a crucial part of this process. Oftentimes, people struggle at this point. They sense something is out of order, yet they do not know what needs to be done to make the change happen.
key executive functioning skills: metacognition, cognitive and emotional flexibility
Once we are fully clear on what we want to achieve, we can decide how it’s gonna be done. We need to consider our relationships, our environment, our resources and everything else that will enable and enhance (or hinder) our efforts. Creating a plan helps us envision ourselves executing it, we visualise every step being successfully achieved, we consider obstacles, we think of ways of overcoming them. We emotionally condition ourselves for the change. it is this mental conditioning that paves the new path and prepares us for it. It is a powerful tool that we can use to our advantage.
key executive functioning skills: planning, organisation, prioritising
Following all the previous steps, we are now best equipped to succeed in making the first steps and following the plan. But this is also a place where we learn through experience and we respond to it by making new realisations. And the cycle continues.
key executive functioning skills: task initiation, self-control, perseverance, metacognition, flexibility
When we were children, we had our parents, our relatives, our community to show us the world and help us interpret it. Our mindset, our habits, our core values, beliefs and opinions, even everyday routines were strongly influenced and easily changed by those around us, which played a crucial role in the formation of our own personalty traits and lifestyle choices. They were shaped and engraved deep inside by emotional attachments that were formed in those first, dependant stages of our lives. The older we grew, the more experiences and knowledge we collected independently from those close to us. As we continued into our adulthood, the wider the world that influenced us grew, the greater the chance that some of our old ways of thinking and being started to become at odds with our current experiences and understanding and some even seized to serve us completely. In most cases, we are able to notice and adjust to these kind of shifts. And sometimes, we may not have even realised or noticed them slowly developing. This often leads to rise of conflicting emotions, origins of which we might not be able to comprehend nor know how to process. And even if we do, even if we can define the problem, breaking old habits, old ways of thinking and reacting to situations is simply too hard or too scary. It is in those situations, it is when we struggle to label, self-correct and adjust to these new experiences and situations or make sense of them, that we might need extra help. That’s where coaching comes in. With the extra support and guidance from professionals, with your dedication, perseverance and open mind, making even the biggest, hardest changes can become an easy task.
